Publication Updates

It’s an exciting time when all this quiet, lonely writing finally gets some traction and sees the light of day! On November 30 I will have 4 poems appearing on the “Academy of the Heart and Mind.” I will post a link when it goes live!

Also, my book is here! Breath for the Breathless has finally been published after I wrote it 2 years ago. Here’s what I posted about it on Facebook:

Clergy friends, I wrote this for you. I wrote this book of liturgy 2 years ago when my life was beginning to unravel. Writing this book was a lifeline for me. I hope it is a lifeline for you too! “Breath for the Breathless: Liturgy for Life’s Difficult Seasons” is the book you want on your shelf when a natural disaster happens, when violence strikes, when you need a prayer regarding mental health struggles or child loss. There are prayers and entire worship services written in here (with hymn suggestions) so that when disaster strikes, you can focus more on pastoral care and less on worship planning. If you’re struggling to find the words to say, my hope is that this book helps.

I am so excited to have gotten several publishing opportunities over the past couple years! Here’s to many more.

Published Sermons!

I am sharing to let everyone know that I have published a book of sermons! “Who May Dwell on Your Holy Hill?” is the first in what I hope to be a long, fruitful, life-giving career in writing and publishing. For anyone who has enjoyed my blogs, I think you will enjoy my sermons as well. They can be used for devotionals (they aren’t too long!) or for other preachers looking for sermon illustrations or for anyone who simply enjoys scripture, theological reflection, and stories. And please feel free to share with your friends! You can order my book here:

Parson’s Porch

Knowing Who I Am

I just read an article entitled¬†“I’m 40 Years Old, and I Don’t Know Who I Am”

I realize that at 28, I can relate to this quandary. In this article Michelle Matthews answers questions she found on Google to help her figure out who she was: what are her values, interests, temperament, activities, life mission, and strengths. I appreciated reading and hearing her unique voice come through in this piece. By the end she seems to feel a bit more oriented about herself. So I am going to attempt this exercise to see if I feel a bit more clued in to who I am and where I’m at.

Values

I value good, strong, deep conversation over delicious food and drinks. Now, this might sound like an “interest”, but hear me out. I value this because this is how I have made deep, lasting friendships, have felt the safest and warmest in my life, and have broken down barriers with people who I thought I didn’t like and couldn’t be friends with. I value the vulnerable heart to hearts that happen over fellowship.

That being said, I realize that over time I am less of a social butterfly. Socially, I thrive in small groups and shrivel up in crowds. I have also pared down large friend circles into a smaller crowd of people that I can count on. I say all of that to say that I value mutual friendships, friendships where both parties are willing to rise up and meet one another. I value the friendships where I can be a safe place, and they can be mine. We can share without judgment, apologize when we mess up, and show our ugly side and still find a way to nurture a friendship. These are rare, but I find them and hold onto them.

I value learning from others, being pushed out of my comfort zone, hearing an opinion that makes me take a good hard look in the mirror, and hearing perspectives from cultures and worldviews that aren’t my own. Human relationships that cross barriers and help us become better people are what changes the world. I value this, and still have much to grow in this area.

These values are all the tangled human relationships that point us to God. I value a relationship with God, even if that relationship gets complicated and messy some (all) times.

 

Interests

Books all day, everyday. One of my selfish desires in life is to be well-read. I’d like to think I’m getting there.

The arts. I miss acting and choir. I miss performing and being part of an artistic group where I can make friends, feel connected, and create something beautiful to give to the wider community. I ache for this. Maybe one day I can be a part of another creative outlet.

Writing. I have always been a writer. Here’s hoping publishing is just around the corner.

Travel. I am not well-traveled yet, but it’s my other selfish desire. Andy and I take short day trips and weekend trips locally pretty often. We can usually only afford a bigger trip once a year. Maybe once we’re both in our 30’s and have established our careers a bit more we’ll see some more of the world.

 

Temperament

Oof. I struggle here. I used to be outgoing and optimistic. I used to be positive and hopeful and trusting and a wide-eyed dreamer. Now I feel reserved, sometimes struggling with hope in the world, yet ambitious. I don’t know if I like that about myself. I don’t want to go back to the naive individual I was. I want to retain some of the wisdom and street smarts I have. Maintaining hope, while being realistic is something I think we all struggle with. I’m still navigating this one.

But I still have an explorer part of me who finds some wonder in discovery. So I’ll hold onto that.

 

Activities

I think some of those things have been addressed in interests? Getting out of the house on the weekends, even if it’s just to the lighthouse 5 miles away or visiting a new city an hour or two away. I’ve started different types of journaling, which has been helpful. I’ve needed to find ways of journaling that works for me, and daily entries aren’t cutting it. So I journal when I travel, I reflect on the month, I write down books I read and places I see, and I do some art. Kind of journal free-styling. I go for walks on the beach about 5 times a week. Sometimes I walk on the side walk down the street if it’s dark since there aren’t any lights on the beach. I see concerts and plays and go to art museums. So I try to get my body moving and take in some sort of small travel or cultural thing weekly.

 

Life Mission

We’re supposed to have one of these?! Well, I’m behind. I mean I could default as a pastor and say that it’s to spread the good news of Jesus Christ, but that’s not just for a pastor right? That’s for all Christians.

I think my life mission might be to learn and share the perspectives of others so that the world feels a little smaller and we feel more connected. I want my writing and my life’s work to foster healthy conversation, uplift silenced voices, and tell stories that show just how human we all are. It’s so easy to “other” people, and then they seem less like people. I want to try to combat that and create some empathy. Again, I have some room to grow here myself.

 

Strengths

I think I’m pretty good at empathetic listening. I have practiced this a lot. I try to stay away from giving unsolicited advice (but you know…it still slips out once in a while.) I want to hear people and share in whatever it is they’re feeling.

I think I’m a good speaker and storyteller. I’m pretty comfortable speaking in front of others and feel pretty natural doing it. But I like crafting a sermon or presentation and delivering it. And I weave in narratives as well.

I think I’m a good teacher. I love sharing information, asking the probing questions, re-framing a question or concept for someone to understand better, watching the “aha!” moments, and having the people I’m teaching surprise me with a response and teach me something.

 

 

I encourage you to do this exercise. It really is orienting and eye-opening. If you’re feeling a bit lost, maybe this will help you find some pieces of yourself again. You’re someone worth knowing and loving, even, and especially, by yourself.

Thoughts on “Leaving the Church”

Barbara Brown Taylor knows the way to our hearts…that’s why she is so popular. Her writing and preaching keep her in the list of top influential preachers each year. I have not had the privilege of learning under her, but I’m certain that she’s an incredible teacher as well.

“Leaving the Church” was a timely read for me. As someone who needed out of the fast-paced Atlanta and looking to move somewhere a little slower-paced, I could identify with Taylor’s situation. She begins the memoir in Atlanta where the traffic, the constant sirens, and the fast paced life have become too much. She has loved the work she has been able to do with outreach and homeless ministry, but she practically lives at her church because there is always so much to do. She want to step out of the city into a slower-paced life.

Taylor visits the mountains and countryside of north Georgia and falls in love with a small country Episcopal church. She prays for God to give her the church, and months later she becomes the rector and priest there.

However, she finds that it wasn’t just Atlanta she needed to step away from, but she needed to step away from parish ministry. Taylor sees flocks of geese flying away, wishing that she could be free and fly away with them.

Taylor explains that the dividing line that elevates someone as “priest” or “pastor” can be exhausting. Pastors want love and community and acceptance just like every other person, but being called to be a leader can be isolating. Taylor describes a pool party where she finally felt at home among all the people she was serving, after she had turned in her resignation. At the pool party she was not wearing her collar, just average street clothes. At some point people started throwing other people in the pool, but would stop short of throwing her, their priest, into the water as if it would be sacrilegious. Missing out on this fun was hurtful and only intensified her loneliness. Suddenly someone grabbed her from behind and threw her into the pool with everyone else. Here she was, soaking wet, laughing and gasping for air just like everyone else. For a moment, the dividing line was down between them all, and that’s exactly what she wanted.

The book ends with her receiving a job offer at a college to be a professor or religion. Her story isn’t finished, so that this book is left open ended as to what will come next in her life.

This book is for everyone: church-goers, pastors, seminarians, professors, and anyone who just likes good writing. Most people can relate to Taylor at some point in the story, even if it’s just by understanding her fatigue and desire for freedom.

This is just a brief overview. Please, go read it and enjoy the way she tells her own story. Her attention to detail and ability to paint a picture with words will have you reading this book in just a couple sittings (or one really dedicated sitting.)

Thoughts on “Inspired”

Typically in the summer I pleasure read and cram 10+ books in 3 months before school starts and I don’t have time to read anymore.

Now I have graduated and I have time to pleasure read! All year! Instead of cramming, I am trying to get through a book a month as a realistic goal. Books are great for continuing to form my theology, educate myself, and provide insights and stories for sermons. I am so glad that I have a career where my love of books comes in handy!

I am not qualified to write an official review by any means, but I thought I might share my thoughts on my books when I finish.

 

This month I read Rachel Held Evans’ new book called “Inspired.”

I always love RHE’s work, and this one definitely delivered. If you’re like me and you struggle with some of the darker parts of scripture or have difficulty hearing scripture in oppressive ways, then this book offers a fresh take on different genres in the Bible. She offers short chapters where she takes a Bible story (like creation, or Job, or Jesus walking on water) and retells it from another perspective or in a modern setting. Then she writes a longer following chapter about that specific genre. The genres are Origin Stories, Deliverance Stories, War Stories, Wisdom Stories, Resistance Stories, Gospel Stories, Fish Stories, and Church Stories. She writes about her own changing perspective of reading scripture and how she has struggled with loving the Bible. She has gone from a literalist, to a cynic, to a reader who is culturally and historically informed that can appreciate the texts for what they are and what they offer.¬† It’s her path to loving the Bible again.

For seminarians and pastors, this may not be a revelatory work, but can be insightful and affirming. For a casual reader, this could provide information that can change someone’s mind about the contents of the Bible and look at scripture with new eyes. I recommend any and all of RHE’s writing, but this is a great resource for anyone who has felt Bible-thumped, or who has been a Bible-thumper (and I have been both!) Happy book worming!