Disappointment, Better Headspace

I was going to post an Advent blog series, but my heart is not in it this year. Instead, I am working hard to prepare my heart and mind for healing and a new year. I will have some “New Year” insights on a later date, but for now, I feel myself moving into a better place so I think it’s better to reflect on that.

I have been shocked by how quickly my support from those who checked in on me at the beginning of the year has dried up. When I needed tangible help in spreading the word about Tales of Glory, few people even responded to my cry for help. I also have been getting lots of rejection letters from publishers. I’ve wondered if my ambition has been a dead end. I’ve thought my talents have fizzled out. I’ve contemplated giving up on the dreams that I have worked years and years for. I’ve watched others succeed and cheered them on but wondered if I will ever see the success that they have.

My hope had evaporated.

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Photo by Tejas Prajapati on Pexels.com

I posted in an earlier blog about how I have been singing with One Voice Choir. We worked so hard to memorize our music. I had 2 colds, a sinus infection, and laryngitis, but I worked through them all for the concert. I focused on the music. In the meantime, I kept my head down and did very little socializing. My heart has just been closed for business. I just wanted to sing and survive the day.

I went on autopilot to get through the day. I felt like my dreams were dying, so life stopped flowing in me the way it was supposed to.

This weekend our concert finally arrived. I was terrified that I wouldn’t have a voice, but my vocal cords healed in time. Throughout the week I was with the choir several times and I finally began conversing with other people. I didn’t hide in my phone. I was feeling open. I realized how kind the people around me were, and how others had also been hesitant to socialize until now as well. And then we performed our concert three times to audiences who loved our music. Getting to perform again was magical. I had truly missed choir in my life.

Getting to be a part of the Charlotte arts community has done some healing work. I have hope again. I feel like life has started flowing again.

I am disappointed in the way things have been going for me. I have no idea if my hard work will help me truly fulfill my ambitions. But after this weekend I feel like some healing has finally happened and that I am moving into a better headspace. I can get off of autopilot and realign my vision for the future.

A New Beginning: Tales of Glory

It’s been almost three months since I have posted a blog. I have been in a season of healing, traveling, and soul searching. The Holy Spirit has been moving, and something new is happening in my ministry.

With my bachelor’s in theatre, Master of Divinity, and Master of Arts in Practical Theology, I have been discerning how I might use my creative arts in my ministry. I had spent the last several months listening to storytelling podcasts and looking into local storytelling events. I went back to theatre work and served as a stage manager in a local production. And then I realized the answer was right under my nose: Biblical Storytelling.

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Through my biblical storytelling called “Tales of Glory” I want to uplift the voices and stories of the marginalized in scripture to bring the Bible to life! Biblical storytelling is a great way to connect people to the stories and people of the Bible through the shared human experience. It’s easy to romanticize stories, idolize “heroes”, and gloss over the stories that make us uncomfortable. However, storyteller brings the stories to life to show us that we are the same, imperfect, messy people we have always been who fight to rise above evil and take the world by surprise through subversive acts. This helps us to be more compassionate to one another. If we can see how human the people in the Bible are, then we relate to them better. This helps us to see the humanness in our neighbors today: our LGBTQ+ neighbors, immigrant neighbors, women neighbors, abused neighbors, neighbors of color, poor neighbors, and so on.

Bringing the Bible to life shows us how God has been at work in the world long before, now in the moment, and in the future long after we have passed on. I would love to bring “Tales of Glory” to your church or community. I want the arts to be accessible to all, and I want us to be connected to one another as God’s family. This is a new journey, a bit of a risk, but one I am very excited about.